Thought of the day

I have some issues with the movie Signs. First, why would an alien race capable of inter-stellar space travel need to rely upon crop circles for navigation? Second, why would an alien race capable of inter-stellar space travel not come equipped with gear that protects them from their deadly nemesis water? Third, why would an alien race capable of inter-stellar space travel choose a planet that is 70% water if that is something which kills them?

10 Responses

  1. Fourth, why would an alien race capable of inter-stellar space travel want to attack a rural farm family. Also, why did that rural farm family have a coal chute in the basement of a house?

  2. Fifth, why would an alien race capable of inter-stellar space travel prefer hand-to-hand combat when they can so easily be beaten up by guys with bats?

  3. The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind – it sells tickets because it has techno-wizbang gadgets for the great unwashed to ogle upon while it has a pseudo-mystery plot line and references of god.

  4. First, clearly because they own stock in Touchstone Pictures.

    Second, because coal remained a, if not the, primary source of heat for most of the developed world well into the 20th century. My grandfather used to tell me about having to carry baskets of coal up from the cellar. That was in rural New York.

    It remains cheaper than wood fuel, at least in places where coal is available. Just in case you were wondering.

  5. I accept the coal chute explanation. Given the copious amount of corn, I presumed the movie took place in Iowa, which isn’t an area I associated with coal. However, IMDb says it was based in Pennsylvania.

  6. Here’s my theory: crop circles are such a stupid idea that it’s impossible to come up with a good plot where they are created by anyone who’s not a drunken British geezer.

    As for deadly water, as someone who’s never seen the movie, I figured it was a standard deus ex machina.

  7. Another thought: Making indelible (near enough for the amount of time they need them) marks is a pretty foolproof way of navigating. Think of what you would do to mark a trail if you were trying to show someone else. What if you were an advance force laying out a global invasion plan.

    It would be plausible, at least in my mind, that even with bitchin’ technology, they haven’t found anything better. I still find it quicker to navigate by sight than by compass and by compass than by GPS. I would assume that would ring true for ET as well.

    Than again Michael, no one is going to pay $8 to see a 25 second movie of the earth blowing up and aliens having a cold one and slinking off into space.

  8. I want nothing but realism in my alien movies.

  9. The real mystery is why any movie studio gives money to M. Knight Shalamalyalamalama.

  10. That’s a good question.

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