Bigots cause tears

We aren’t a Christian nation, but…

Colbert mocks bad Supreme Court decision

We all remember that Supreme Court decision that entirely transgressed the purpose and even spirit of corporate law. It was funny, of course – just in a bad way. But now fortunately Stephen Colbert has made it funny in a good way:

A couple hundred people stood around holding cameras as comedian Stephen Colbert dropped into Washington and filed papers for his Super PAC. It was the most excitement the Federal Election Commission and its office may ever see…

“The Supreme Court’s decision in Citizens United has proved that unlimited corporate money equals free speech,” said Colbert as the crowd cheered, clapped and booed. By the Colbert logic, that means that no corporate money means “silence.”

The crowd cheered as Colbert stepped out of the FEC building, with nearly everyone holding up their cameras as the funnyman gave his usual performance.

“I want to open the Colbert super PAC for all those PAC-less Americans,” said Colbert, as several in the crowd recited his PAC’s motto: “Making a better ‘tomorrow’ tomorrow.”

This about the only good thing to come of this decision.

Every day is Friday in my heart

Santorum

I love the Internet.

As most people know by this point, the top Google search result for Rick Santorum is an obscene sex term assigned to him by Dan Savage.

After Santorum compared man-on-man sex in 2003 to man-on-dog sex, Savage told his readers to “Google bomb” Santorum, so the top search result for his name would be a graphic sex term. (If you want to know what it is, just Google it).

The Google bomb worked, and Rick Santorum has been complaining lately about how this is the cross he must bear.

But Santorum complaining about it is only making the problem worse, and last week his name was one of the hottest search terms on Google.

“By now the only people who haven’t heard about this are the Amish,” said [Stephen] Colbert [on The Colbert Report]. “He’ll do well with the Pennsylvania Dutch.”

Fear not for there is no need to head all the way over to what is probably most people’s homepage. I’ve got the definition right here.

santorum (san-TOR-um) n.
1. The frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex.

It’s too nice.